How to be a good thought partner and not just a leader?

Thought partner - these two little words might seem new on your radar. But they are not! Why? Your answer lies in this question: Have you ever met someone who was able to amplify your capacity, and helped reach clarity in professional discernment and confidence in your actions? If yes, then that person was your thought partner!

A thought partner looks just like us, he is no alien. He can be sometimes quiet, sometimes blunt, sometimes assertive, and show thousand other colors of emotions and behaviors just the way we do. Speaking of that, if you think you can be committed to a person who is seeking clarity, and offer support, powerful questions, and accountability, then oh dear, you too have the potential to become a true thought partner.

The gory details of a thought partner

You can find a thought partner anywhere in the course of your life, someone whom you can engage with and listen to. If you find that someone’s knowledge, or way of thinking challenges and provokes divergent thinking and action in you, then he is that ‘strong mentor’ and ‘sponsor’ you are looking for!

Who is a thought partner?

Think of it this way, of all the mentors available to you, you narrowed down a person with whom you can have a genuine and constructive dialogue. To be above board isn’t this something to be appreciated for? It is a huge compliment to be one’s genuine thought partner in a fast-moving digital world.

Being credible and influential for customers, colleagues, or investors will demand you to challenge their thinking, modify their paradigms, assumptions, or actions and provoke them to innovate or lead. The client will always remain an expert in his field of business but he can move forward more strategically, efficiently, and in a less-sabotaging manner by leveraging the knowledge and support of his thought partner.

All in all, acting as a thought partner for someone is one of the most powerful ways a coach or consultant can serve a client.

Thought partner vs. thought leader

Don’t get hold of the wrong end of the stick by confusing a thought partner with a thought leader. Widely recognized as leading experts and visionaries in their field, thought leaders, know how to lead, how to bring a point of view to the table that cannot be obtained elsewhere, how to recognize trends before they happen, and apply the insights to achieve desirable results.

If you want to be a trusted leader, first you have to be a thought partner. Now an open-ended question is that can a thought partner be a thought leader? Yes, they can be depending on the skills they can contribute. Thought partnership or a thought partner,

Address real-world problems, mostly in real-time by using the ideas from great thought leadership.
Bring both the thinkers on the same page irrespective of their expertise.
Make you feel more like a conversation between peers than a critique.
Is empathetic with the client, as both the parties understand each other’s environment.
Act as a catalyst for clarity and confidence for the person in need of answers.

What kind of thought partner are you?

A true thought partner has the knowledge, skills, and tools to be a guide and a companion to one’s learning journey. But, what carries more weight is your thinking style. Yes, to become an efficient thought partner, you need to understand what you could offer, what is your area of expertise, and what is your thinking.

To know what’s what, we would suggest you to read Mark Bonchek’s and Elisa Steele’s ‘What Kind of Thinker Are You?’. They have very beautifully explicated the details of thinking styles into two dimensions:

Orientation (big picture vs. details)
Focus (ideas, process, action, or relationships)

Hang on, you don’t have to die of curiosity, because here is a glimpse of the eight thinking styles that can act as a perfect catalyst for laying the foundation of becoming a true thought partner.

Without revealing the crux, here is the simplest yet most precise description of each thinking style:

Coach: Cultivating people and potential

Connector: Building and strengthening relationships

Energizer: Mobilizing people into action

Expert: Achieving objectivity and insight

Explorer: Generating creative ideas

Optimizer: Improving productivity and efficiency

Planner: Designing effective systems

Producer: Achieving completion and momentum

Once you are done analyzing your thinking style on the basis of these eight, evaluate how the one or two styles that best describe you can provoke you to innovate or lead to value creation in your business, career, or life.

Presto! The groundwork is done and you are now prepared to soak up 4 golden rules to become a true thought partner.

The next big thing: How to be a thought partner?

Garnering an enviable position of credibility, influence, and trust doesn’t happen overnight. Building this kind of relationship takes time, patience, and effort along with the insight that a thought partner can contribute with their questions as well as with their answers.

Remember, If you want to be a good leader, building the foundation by being a good thought leader can be the best managerial call. Here are some simple and easy ways to cultivate these qualities and become a true thought partner:

Learn better with questions: Being credible and influential does not always demand knowing all the answers. Sometimes, the process needs to ask the right questions at the right time. Shoot situational questions with who, what, where, when, how, and how much followed by motivation questions to ascertain why that situation exists. Now go ahead, prepare a report, design a presentation, and boil down everything to an effective strategy.

Put on a ‘what if’ lens and consider possibilities: Implication questions are rare but they propel us to consider other perspectives and work around obstacles. You will see a remarkable difference if you can push the boundaries, invest a bit more mental energy, overcome imagination block, and listen carefully. ‘What if’ or implication questions can lead to lateral thinking and innovation.

Give it a personalized touch: A good thought partnership is all about the power of a relationship. Achieving together, and coming together as equals. Pour in your unique methodology, perspectives, and personal experiences with your client’s commitment and knowledge. Don’t forget to cultivate this partnership with our own expressions of love, honesty, and integrity.

Clarify potential pitfalls: Whether you are working in an organization, or are a student you can always be a thought partner. But before you jump on the bandwagon, clarify that is your prospective partner and you are committed to making progress in work and life? Do you both have a blueprint for it? And if not, can the thought partnership provide you with the one? These questions will give a fair picture of your demands and realizations, which, when addressed effectively can work wonders.

That is all about the basics of being a good thought partner and not just a leader. Hold on, we have a bonus for you - a fun fact!

Do you know that the people who engage regularly with a thought partner achieve higher levels of performance and success? Then what are waiting for, be one, and help the budding professionals out there to come out with flying colors.

For more informational content, read:

Shivangi Vatsal

Sr. Associate Content Strategist @Unstop

I am a storyteller by nature. At Unstop, I tell stories ripe with promise and inspiration, and in life, I voice out the stories of our four-legged furry friends. Providing a prospect of a good life filled with equal opportunities to students and our pawsome buddies helps me sleep better at night. And for those rainy evenings, I turn to my colors.