From 15 Failed Attempts In 2 Years To Getting A Call From SCMHRD!

Arushi Gupta was a stop-not force who stood against all odds, failed in about 15 attempts at various entrances in a span of just 2 years, but still made it in the end.

It all started in the year 2019 when I applied for the Young Leaders Program of the Indian School of Business and qualified for the same on my very first attempt. I received this news of my qualification on 6th May 2019, and right after that, I started preparing for the GMAT. I took my GMAT on 28th August 2019 and scored an odd 520, which was my first failure in this saga of failures ultimately leading to success. I wasn’t very open about it, but this score triggered my past trauma of having scored below my expectations in 12th boards and pushed me into a downward spiral of believing that I would never be able to achieve what I want. 

The mistake in CAT

Just within 3 months, CAT '19 was scheduled when I had completely lost my confidence for the same. Whenever I used to study, I always flashed back to my memory of having failed the GMAT. Soon, November arrived and the D-day came when I went to write CAT. I saw aspirants who were highly focused and looked really confident. I immediately formed an opinion of myself that the CAT is something that I would not be able to do as I am nobody in front of such aspirants, which was my second mistake. I went to write the exam and suddenly because of lack of confidence my hands started trembling, and I lost my focus.

A ray in the rain

Soon notepads were distributed in the exam hall, and on top, logos of various IIMs were made. Those logos literally made me smile in that moment of tension; from within I knew that I wouldn’t be able to ace it but for those 5-10 minutes I actually imagined myself sitting in a top B-school and felt enchanted doing so. Exactly at 9 AM, the exam started and I performed miserably. Soon, the results were announced and I had scored just 45%ile. I knew I had messed up big time and my confidence was completely shattered, soon the results for other exams were also announced and I had failed them too (IIFT, NMAT, XAT). I was so frustrated with all these results that I decided that I won’t do an MBA; I would do something where success is possible for me. 

The spark was ignited

After the exam season of 2019 was over, I was invited as a national finalist at a Tier-1 B-school's case study competition, where I got the opportunity to stay in their hostel and experience MBA life for 2 days. When I visited the campus and lived that B-school life, I understood that though I was unable to perform in my entrances, this is something I really wanted to do and experience. Visiting that B-school gave a boost to my dead spirits and I decided that I would take the CAT again. 

For a few days, my spirits were very high and I purchased all the standard books for CAT preparation and had a popular coaching material with me, collected all of it, and decided that I would start preparing as soon as my final year’s semester exams would be over. I was also keeping an option of taking work experience and sat for college placements, where I bagged 3 placement offers from established companies and startups. After grabbing these offers, I was in a fix, whether to go for masters this year itself or take experience and then sit for entrances.

Pandemic deepened the pickle

Soon when the placement process at our college got over in March 2020, the Covid-19 pandemic arrived and disrupted all my plans. The final semester exams for which I was waiting to happen were postponed indefinitely and everything went haywire. 2 of the placement offers that I had received got revoked and there was no information about the 3rd one till August 2020. After a few months into the pandemic, tensions related to career started kicking in. 

Going in for CAT 2020

In July 2020, when none of my semester exams had happened, I finally decided and started preparing for management entrances. I did not make a timetable, but I had set goals for each week and month regarding what needed to be done in that short time span. I practiced all the standard books and the coaching material and enrolled myself in the popular AIMCAT test series as well. I started right from the basics and fundamentals and went on practicing till the advanced level. There were several ups and downs in this period one I scored a 90 and the other day got stuck at 70. 

As the exam was approaching, fears and uncertainties rose day by day. A single 99%ile in one section used to be the best moment of my day and the only thing to talk to with my parents.  With all such mixed emotions and such speculations, the main 3 months before the CAT passed and once again, I was sitting in front of the computer screen waiting for CAT '20 to commence. 

Back to the puddle

I took CAT in slot 3, which was apparently considered the worst slot for CAT 2020, and my situation being no better, I literally had one of the worst experiences of my life. I could see all my hard work, those 10-15 hours that I had put in every day, those sleepless nights, everything going to waste. I had practised 50 full-length mocks and had taken 600 sectional mock tests and it was just too unbelievable for me to believe and experience that all of that has gone in vain. For days I couldn’t digest the fact that I would be scoring below 50 %ile yet again, even after working so hard. 

In the gap between when the CAT took place and the results were to be announced, every day was a very heavy one as the fact that how I would face my parents and everyone around me with such a low score haunted me and made me insomniac for 2 months. It was very hard for me to stay motivated as I could derive positivity from nowhere, my CAT was really bad, and I didn’t have any backup plan as my offers had also been revoked. It was all a nightmare that I was living every single day of my life.

Moving further - SNAP

I took SNAP on 20th December after which I felt confident a bit but not completely satisfied, also took NMAT on the 22nd where I scored 236 with a low score in quants. Soon, on 2nd January CAT results were announced and I didn’t check my result and also didn’t tell anyone that it has been announced, but my parents got to know about the declaration right before my second attempt of SNAP and asked me to check it. I didn’t check the result even after they asked me several times because I knew it was going to mentally disturb me and SNAP was one exam where I could see some hope. 

So, after all those heated discussions with my parents, I didn’t check the result and started studying for SNAP, where I eventually scored 97.93 %ile. Yes, the only exam that I qualified for and the one that saved me one year and my pride. In the process, I also received calls from SCMHRD and SIBM Pune (the only colleges for which I had filled out the form). Getting a call from SIBM Pune was literally a luck stroke for me as it was very common speculation that the college never calls below 98, I was elated to have received the call from that college.

Post-exam journey

Soon the GD-PI-WAT process began and my interview for SCMHRD was the first one to be held. It was a moment of tension and excitement, both at the same time as I had no other calls and I knew I couldn’t mess up in this. So, I gave my best during the whole process, but in the last step which was the interview, I was grilled a lot. After the interview, I wasn’t having a good feeling and there was constantly a voice within me which was questioning my capabilities. 

Whatever mistakes I had committed in SCMHRD’s interview, I rectified them within a week of SIBM Pune’s interview. I worked on those mistakes and went through full preparation for the interview. After SIBM Pune’s interview, I was convinced that the interview was up to the mark and I had given my best. After 10 days, SIBM Pune’s result was announced and the bad news came first when I got waitlisted at a number that I knew was completely out of the conversion ballpark. I was again shattered, I was of the belief that my SCMHRD would also not convert, and I was full of negativity.

Finally, the Gods smiled

On 16th March at 1:30 PM, my destiny changed - I had converted SCMHRD right in the first merit list. It was unbelievable, it was a feeling that I may not even be able to put into words, after so many failures, after crying and not being able to understand why all that was happening (when I have always been a topper throughout and now was failing continuously), after all this while, I finally converted a top B-school. It was such a moment of relief, a moment I would never be able to forget.  

The learning curve

So, this was my journey, a journey that was not at all easy and ultimately expanded my learning curve, not only academically, but also gave me a lot of life lessons. The journey is going to stay with me forever. It has humbled me and taught me the value of gratitude, it also taught me that hard work done with good intentions never goes to waste and that whatever we give, comes back to us.

I sense that I have become a more rational person and developed the habit of viewing things deeply. I believe all those experiences were necessary to make me a better person not just professionally, but also in my personal life. I truly understand the value of what I have achieved, which my previous self may not have understood.

Now that I've got this, I'll try my best to make the most out of this opportunity. Finally, I am now at peace and am trying to expand my horizon as learning never stops. This may sound like a very idealistic story, but the fact that I created my own story will motivate me throughout my life.

For more interesting stories:

1. Learn how to ace management exams from SNAP 2020 Topper Minkesh Devani, IIM Shillong
2. “My 3 years journey of 3 attempts, and from getting 0 IIM Calls to converting 10 colleges” - Ashwini Rahangdale from IIM Calcutta
3. Did not make it to IIMs? Don’t worry, it is not the end!
4. 12 management exams, a gap year, and KJ Somaiya - MBA journey of Yuvraj Joshi
5. From acing CAT with 99.48 percentile to securing admission into 6 renowned MBA colleges